Anger is not a bad feeling. Some people believe that anger is bad and that they shouldn’t express anger. This is not true! It’s completely normal to feel angry when you feel threatened, but anger sometimes gets the upper hand. As a result, you may do or say things that hurt others.

Here are certain ways to cool your anger while arguing and while you are at edge.

Here are steps to do when you’re arguing :

  1. Make it a priority to respond kindly/respectfully.
  2. Focus on breathing slowly and deeply.
  3. Politely excuse yourself from the area/room, get space.
  4. Accept that you won’t get through to someone and inwardly wis them peace.
  5. Ask yourself if this is worth the energy.
  6. Notice that you’re angry, imagine yourself feeling forgiving.
  7. Put yourself in the other person’s shoes.
  8. Breathe when you want to yell or raise your voice.
  9. Emulate how you think someone peaceful would respond.

Here are steps to do when you’re at edge :

  1. Spray a calming smell.
  2. Pet/Stroke an animal gently.
  3. Watch/Listen to comedy.
  4. Go for a walk/run
  5. Take a nap
  6. Eat a delicious meal
  7. Spend time in nature
  8. Allow yourself to laugh.
  9. Make a joke or read one.
  10. Close your eyes, focus on being quiet.
  11. Write down your anger.
  12. Pop balloons or water balloons.
  13. Go out with friends.
  14. Go see a movie.
  15. Play on the playground.
  16. Take a warm bath with epsom salts.
  17. Sit with a sand garden
  18. Plant flowers
  19. Listen o relaxing music/sounds
  20. Dance 
  21. Focus on a craft
  22. Look at funny/cute pictures or video online

When you’re fed up :

  1. Do what you can to fix the problem & accept that it’s all you can do.
  2. Vent it out
  3. Have a good cry privately or with someone who cares.
  4. Punch pillows until you can/t anymore.
  5. Give yourself a time out, go somewhere quiet and get cozy
  6. Write your frustration in an email, but don’t send, sleep on it.
  7. Turn off the news/ watch family programming.
  8. Speak with a positive supportive guide/friend.

Ask your physician or trained health professional about anger management
courses and other helpful resources in your community. Please consider getting help if anger is damaging your life and the life of your loved ones in any way.

46 responses to “Ways to Cool Your Anger”

    1. Thank you. Glad you liked it. What do you do to cool your anger?

      Like

      1. Most times, I listen to worship music like Hillsong and also find 10 more reason not to be angry..

        Liked by 2 people

      2. Ah music. Listening to music can have a tremendously relaxing effect on our minds and bodies, especially slow, quiet classical music. This type of music can have a beneficial effect on our physiological functions, slowing the pulse and heart rate, lowering blood pressure, and decreasing the levels of stress hormones. Music, in short, can act as a powerful stress management tool in our lives.

        Liked by 1 person

  1. Great post, you have shared expressing anger as a natural emotion and given tools. What and how we deal with anger makes all the difference. Writing, listening to worship and calming music, singing hymns, reading uplifting words and walking are great. Thanks for sharing .

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Yes indeed. Thank you for sharing such good options with us. I believe Breathing is the number one and most effective technique for reducing anger and anxiety quickly. That’s why taking long, deep calming breaths disrupts that loop and helps you calm down. There are various breathing techniques to help you calm down.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Yes, I agree. After responding, immediately, I was reminded of the importance of breathing. Then laughed reflecting back. Take a breath, calm down, blow out the candle. Techniques used often, that have become second nature. Thanks for reminder 🤗🙏

        Liked by 1 person

      2. You are most welcome.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Thanks for sharing.. I listen to rock music to calm my anger 😀

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Ah that’s a first. But music has a wonderful effect on our mind.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. An indeed one!!!! Thank you and as I am new to blogging. Support me. Kushy’s_Random_Thoughts (myscribbleddthoughts.wordpress.com).

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Sure. Good luck with your blogging. Welcome.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Yes focusing on breathing always help me. Nice post

    Like

  5. 23. If for some reason you’re still angry, go outside with a hammer and hammer the shit out of the closest tree while yelling as loud as you can.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hahahaha well that could be dangerous Frank.

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Thank you for the tips I really didn’t know how to control this because i would yell and it made matters worse..i will definitely try this

    Liked by 1 person

    1. See the main trick is to not react at that point of time when you want to the most. I know it’s difficult and I can understand that sometimes the circumstances are such that you can’t stop yourself. But it’s a learned behaviour just like our anger 🙂
      Good luck and take care. Thank you for stopping by.

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Wonderful tips!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Glad you liked them.

      Like

  8. Lovely post. Well I cry to calm my anger😅

    Like

  9. Thank you for sharing this information. After doing all those things and after passing some time, honestly it creeps into you with mere thought of it. I was wondering then what? Repeat the same! I mean how would you face it head on?

    Like

    1. Thank you. I am glad you liked it. The long-term physical effects of uncontrolled anger include increased anxiety, high blood pressure and headache. Anger can be a positive and useful emotion, if it is expressed appropriately. Long-term strategies for anger management include regular exercise, learning relaxation techniques and counselling.

      Like

  10. Thank you for sharing this! I’ve only recently allowed myself to believe it’s okay to feel angry! It really helps to acknowledge it first instead of be ashamed of it! 🙏🏽

    Liked by 1 person

    1. People say it’s not good to be angry for your mental and physical health. But, the truth is that you will feel angry sometimes. You don’t need to feel guilty about it either. It’s okay to feel angry and being able to feel this particular emotion is a healthy thing for you to do. Emotions like sadness, guilt, fear, envy, and anger are an important part of your emotional intelligence.

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you. Glad you liked it. It is very important to control your anger.
      It teaches you to accept what you can’t change and channel your energy to feel positive and calm. It is important for people from all walks of life to control and manage their anger. Employees must learn to deal with work pressure and demanding supervisors.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Your welcome. I couldn’t agree more.🙂

        Liked by 1 person

  11. I like the pop balloons one 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hahahha it is very relaxing isn’t it !!!

      Like

    1. I am glad you liked it. Anger is a normal human emotion. A primal instinct, even. Anger varies in intensity from irritation to rage. When you feel any form of the variation, the amygdala is the part of your brain that sounds the alarm. Next comes the adrenaline rushing through your body. Because the physical effects of anger are so good at clouding your brain, it is likely you will react in a way that is not typical of your behavior when compared to your rational, thinking self.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Definitely agree with the thoughts shared by you. Surely it’s going to help all in daily routine.

        Liked by 1 person

  12. Do press-ups until you can’t anymore, then do more.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes exercise releases adrenaline which is a mood booster.

      Like

  13. i saw your blog it is good

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you. I am so glad you liked it. Thank you for stopping by.

      Like

  14. Freeze plates of water so when you’re super pissed, you can throw them into the shower. It makes a great smashing sound, releases some pent up physical energy that’s helping to fuel that anger and nothing (or someone -including yourself. You’re a someone.)

    My mother had a saying about arguments. “When you’re arguing, don’t hit below the belt. But don’t wear yours around your forehead.”

    It’s ok if you’re a sensitive person. But it’s not fair to the rest of us if you run around the world without wearing any skin at all.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I agree with what your mother said Leonise. Wise words indeed. The most important part is to know when to stop.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. LOL- good point! You could end up with an overflowing tub of water. I would add to my mother’s statement that you can’t keep moving your belt all over the place. We all have certain “belt sites” that might be higher for one thing or another but there needs to be some level of consistency so I know what to expect.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Hahahaha thank you for sharing these tips.

        Like

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