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Today we will talk about how can we understand each other better. Arguments are a breeding ground for discontent. Yet many arguments, especially with people we love, are birthed from simple misunderstandings that are blown out of proportion. Understanding other people is a tall order because everybody is different—but that’s what makes life worthwhile: our time on this planet would be mundane if we all had the same personalities, desires, values, and beliefs. And yet, even with our myriad distinctions, we all want the same things out of life: happiness, purpose, fulfilment. Too often, however, we believe our way is the right way: we believe our path toward contentment is the single correct path. So, instead of attempting to understand other points of view, we try to force people onto our path, shoving aside their beliefs to showcase why we are right and why they are wrong.
This type of fervent, unwavering certitude is rarely a good idea—even if you are “right”—because it discounts the other person’s thoughts and feelings, which leads to defensive posturing, which leads to arguing, which leads to discontentment, which leads to further posturing, misunderstandings, arguments, discontentment. What an ugly cycle. To avoid this spiral of misunderstanding—and eventually arrive at a place of shared contentment—we must avoid acting on impulse, and we must instead work through the four stages of understanding others.
Let’s learn more about them tomorrow.
Reference : https://www.theminimalists.com/understanding/