Yes it’s painful to look within but look anyways.
One of the most powerful, yet often difficult, activities that we can do for our personal growth, is to fully explore why, on some occasions, certain things said or done to us by others can have an enormously upsetting or hurtful impact on us.
Have you ever wondered why some negative situations, whilst unpleasant, just pass us by? We manage to move on quickly, brush ourselves off, and forget about it with minimal effort. Yet, other unpleasant situations can really drag us down, we spend hours talking about it or reliving it in our mind, and generally struggle to let it go. Why is that? What is the difference that makes the difference? Why do some situations upset us so deeply, whilst others don’t?
I believe these are the very experiences that, although painful, provide us with the biggest opportunity to dig deep, soul search, and learn about ourselves and our behavior. I would go so far as to say, that these situations or experiences may well in fact be badly wrapped gifts.
By gift, I am referring to the opportunity to learn something about our self, to understand ourselves better, to make a change, to improve something, or address something. Once we have discovered what that is, the negative situation immediately shrinks in size and strength, we see it through a different lens, and as a result, our negative emotions reduce.
Take the time to cast your mind back now to the last time someone truly upset, angered, or hurt you. Why did the experience have such a powerful impact on you? What could you learn from it about yourself, and what learning or gift could you find in that situation? Did they say anything that may have had some truth in it or some accuracy? Were they right in any way at all, even though it hurt and if so, what can you change take as the gift?