Are you always second-guessing yourself? Maybe you shouldn’t have bought the purple shoes, maybe you should have called that guy back, maybe you should have majored in something else, took a different job, moved to a different place, the list goes on and on and on…
Most people have made a pivotal decision in their life where they feel they have failed. The human brain tends to be more sensitive to the negatives and failures. That is why we ruminate on the bad and don’t trust ourselves. We keep a mental inventory of all the bad decisions we have made making it more difficult to trust we are making the right decisions going forward.
Studies done by psychologist Dr. John Cacioppo prove the brain reacts stronger to negative stimuli than positive. Cacioppo showed people pictures that generally produce positive feelings, for example tasty food or a luxury car. Then he showed them pictures of things that usually stir up negative feelings, such as an injured person or animal, followed by pictures of items that produce neutral feelings, like a plate or hair dryer. As the pictures were shown he recorded electrical activity in the brain and found that the brain reacted stronger to the negative stimuli, showing that our attitudes are more heavily influenced by the negative. For more on this research see: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/articles/200306/our-brains-negative-bias .
We have all made positive decisions. We have made decisions that have left us feeling satisfied, try to focus on those. You can drive yourself crazy always wondering how things would have turned out if you took a different path, but what is the use in that. You need to start to trust in yourself, trust that you have done the best you can and made the right choice for you in the moment.