Moving On

After a while, the hurt hurts less. You start to see reason, understand why they did what they did. Knowing that it takes two hands to clap. Learn, that not everyone you meet will stay in your life forever. Sometimes, they’re a passing character in a chapter of your book. They are there to teach you a certain lesson, to help you experience different things in life – different emotions, to grow, and maybe to show you how to love yourself better. Find your worth.

Some of the characters will be difficult to replace when their time has come to an end in a chapter of your life. But, it is important to learn and to see the necessity to let them go, even if you don’t want to.

At the beginning, it will hurt. It’s the kind of hurt that will leave you crying till you fall asleep at 3am, puffy eyes, nose blocked and swollen. The kind of hurt that follows you everywhere – reminding you of the memories you had once shared at particular places you pass by. The hurt that leaves you thinking if you ever meant anything to them. Heartbreak is inevitable, especially with the people you love. But if it’s one thing I’ve learned: you cannot have expectations. You can’t expect them to love you back the same way you love them, with the same amount of intensity, and that my friend is the sad truth. The way you love someone – that does not determine the way that person is going to love you back. You can have multiple connections with people, but that does not necessarily mean that they are meant for you, and darling, it’s the same with love. This applies to both friendships and relationships, as we hate to admit it.

The hardest part about losing someone you love is not the goodbye, rather than learning to live without them. And what fuels the hurt is when you see how they’re able to move on without you. But can you blame them? Honestly, you can’t. My momma always said “If you really love that person, you will want them to be happy. Even if it means that they’re gonna be happy without you, you will respect that and let them go. Because you want them to be happy. But what if I don’t want to let them go? Would you rather be happy with someone, but that person does not feel the same kind of happiness with you? That bothered me, a lot honestly. The one thing people crave, it’s love and being valued. However, when you look for love, to find that healing to fill that void they’ve left – I have found that it never really works out. It’s not purely genuine? I feel it’s more of a forced connection because you want to fill that void, you crave that drug and rush called “love” because it’s a beautiful felling. However, the best kind of love, something that I find the purest, is unexpected love. Because you’re not looking for something, you’re not looking for healing. Sometimes, through the people that we meet, we find healing. And the world doesn’t seem that bitter after all.

They help you get back onto your feet, but you’re much stronger now. Stronger than before, aware. Aware of how love can be so fragile and pure yet it has the power to break, shatter and destroy. Wiser, as to who you allow yourself to love.

34 Comments Add yours

  1. sonalime1009 says:

    Very well said 😊🤗
    Thanks for sharing this post 😊

    Liked by 3 people

    1. GS says:

      Most Welcome

      Liked by 2 people

  2. cathyishappy says:

    It’s so hard at the time but you’re absolutely right. I try to think of the good things and be grateful for everything but it’s an important lesson to learn that not everyone who comes into your life will stay 🤗

    Liked by 4 people

    1. GS says:

      Absolutely

      Liked by 2 people

  3. Cheryl says:

    Oh my goodness thank you! You have expressed exactly how I feel. Learning to live without them, trying to fill the void but it never works out. Wanting happiness for them regardless of how you feel. ❤️

    Liked by 4 people

    1. GS says:

      I remember the saying “There will never be rainbows in our lives without tears”. Now, the only thing for us to do is focus on what’s going on in our lives at present, how we can contribute to other’s happiness with kind deeds, gaining new friends and forgetting about the past. People who walk out of our lives were never meant to be part of our lives. Embrace your emotions – you are human. This doesn’t mean your life is ending, rather you’re richer for the experience. Do you feel better already? I hope so!

      Liked by 3 people

      1. Cheryl says:

        yes, richer for the experiences, absolutely!

        Liked by 2 people

      2. GS says:

        🙂 Happy New Year!

        Liked by 2 people

  4. Currently going through a dilemma phase and it feels like universe conspired to made me read this .
    Very well written and it’s sad to admit that everything is true in this….. The heartbreak , the sadness….the grief and tough phase of moving on

    Liked by 4 people

    1. GS says:

      Allow yourself to grieve. Acknowledge all the hurt and the pain. Give yourself time. One day, you’ll wake up with the understanding that God or the universe has other plans for you. Accept things as they are. Trust the process. Learn from every experience. You are exactly where you are meant to be. Just breathe and live. You are worthy. You are loved.

      Only onwards and upwards for you in 2022

      Liked by 2 people

  5. Wishing uu too a Happy New year

    Liked by 3 people

  6. Sapientland says:

    I sense a powerful message from the post you have written here. You got me thinking about how it had been really hard for me to move on after losing someone but due to their happiness matters more than my own, I find it helpful to let them go. Thank you for this fascinating words! 😊

    Liked by 2 people

    1. GS says:

      Most welcome. I am glad you could identify with the purpose of the post. Happy New Year!

      Liked by 2 people

      1. Sapientland says:

        Great to know that from you. Happy New Year to you too! 😊

        Liked by 2 people

  7. Eloho says:

    Indeed moving on is difficult but a step to learning not too be too expectant, I have been there it’s not a nice place. But we learn to walk out. Thanks for the reminder. Happy New Year

    Liked by 2 people

    1. GS says:

      Happy New Year!
      We all walking ourselves home at our own pace

      Liked by 1 person

  8. Damn, I needed to hear this today. Thank you.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. GS says:

      Awesome Sauce. I am glad you came across this post.

      Liked by 2 people

    1. GS says:

      Thank you for sharing

      Liked by 2 people

      1. Always a joy and pleasure to read and share your posts with followers, My Dear! Hope you have a great day!! 😘💕🎁🌹

        Liked by 2 people

  9. Semeli says:

    Unconditional love is self-love only… Indeed, it is extremely hard to let someone you love go. You learn it as it goes. Very relatable. Thank you for sharing, I enjoyed reading your post. ❤️

    Liked by 2 people

    1. GS says:

      Thank you Semeli. Self-love has many benefits; the first benefit is greater life satisfaction. When we love ourselves more we instantly change our perspective of the world. Self-love can give us a more positive attitude towards life. Another important benefit of self-love is better mental health.

      Liked by 1 person

  10. Truly said. Well expressed!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. GS says:

      The truth is this: Your life will be different. Of course, things will hurt. Parts of your life are uprooting, they are changing.

      Liked by 1 person

  11. Perspective says:

    Bang on, i have thought about it many times, but its love that holds me back from not expecting 😉

    Liked by 2 people

    1. GS says:

      Great perspective

      Liked by 1 person

  12. Arun Bhagat says:

    Another very well written piece! Living without expectations and letting go is not that easy but worth practising as that is the only way to stay happy and equanimous and to emerge stronger in the journey of life. The gems coming from you are really precious!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. GS says:

      Living without expectations means to experience life spontaneously in the moment. It doesn’t mean to never make goals or plans for the future – those are essential to a full, purposeful life. It simply means that we live the journey rather than fixating on the destination of those goals and dreams.

      Liked by 2 people

  13. Excellent! This is a wonderful job. May your strength never diminished 🙏🙏🙏

    Liked by 1 person

    1. GS says:

      Thank you!

      Liked by 1 person

  14. mommabreeze says:

    The hardest part is learning to live without them… that speaks to my heart. I’m pretty sure I’m on the way to a divorce and that right there is the reason I’m so terrified. We’ve been together 15 years, living without him is starting from scratch.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. GS says:

      I am sorry to hear that.
      But you can do this. Everything is going to be okay. This is just a hard time

      Like

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