Practice Forgiveness

Forgiveness can even lead to feelings of understanding, empathy and compassion for the one who hurt you. Forgiveness doesn’t mean forgetting or excusing the harm done to you or making up with the person who caused the harm. Forgiveness brings a kind of peace that helps you go on with life.

Here are a few steps for granting the gift of forgiveness :

  • Acknowledge the anger and hurt caused by the clearly identified specific offences.
  • Bar revenge and any thought of infecting harm as repayment or punishment to the offender.
  • Consider the offender’s perspective. Try to understand his/her attitude and behaviour.
  • Decide to accept the hurt without unloading it on the offender. Passing it back and forth magnifies it.
  • Extend compassion and good will to the offender. That releases the offended from the offence.

Forgiving others is essential for spiritual growth. ย Your experience of someone who has hurt you, while painful, is now nothing more that a thought or feeling that you carry around. These thoughts of resentment, anger, and hatred represent slow, debilitating energies that will dis-empower you if you continue to let these thoughts occupy space in your head. If you could release them, you would know more peace.

Reference : https://www.psychologytools.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/05/forgiveness_methods_1.jpg

38 Comments Add yours

  1. So true๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿ‘Œ

    Liked by 2 people

    1. GS says:

      Forgiveness is for our own growth and happiness. When we hold on to hurt, pain, resentment, and anger it harms us far more than it harms the offender. Forgiveness frees us to live in the present. Forgiveness allows us to move on without anger or contempt or seeking revenge.

      Like

  2. afairfox says:

    How bout repentance? For being a dick to someone. I know a lot of people who could use somd repenting instead of ny forgiveness

    Liked by 3 people

    1. GS says:

      Repentance isnโ€™t one of those popular topics to discuss for most people. In fact, a lot of followers of Christ often push this subject to the back of the line behind other current trending ones. I think it has a lot to do with the fact that we donโ€™t want to offend people or โ€œjudgeโ€ them. Are we more concerned with how we might offend others or if we are offending God? Are we really loving others if we are content as they continue to sin? Why is repentance important?

      Like

    1. GS says:

      Thank you for sharing

      Liked by 1 person

    1. GS says:

      Thank you for sharing

      Like

  3. Sandymancan says:

    So true you can’t hold hate for anything on the outside without storing hate up on the inside.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. GS says:

      True. Forgiveness can even lead to feelings of understanding, empathy and compassion for the one who hurt you. Forgiveness doesn’t mean forgetting or excusing the harm done to you or making up with the person who caused the harm. Forgiveness brings a kind of peace that helps you go on with life.

      Like

    1. GS says:

      Thank you for sharing

      Like

  4. Kellie says:

    I like the part about your experience now being a thought or feeling, thanks for this ๐Ÿ‘

    Liked by 2 people

    1. GS says:

      Glad you liked the post Kellie. Emotions don’t occur within a vacuum. Instead, they are usually elicited by and experienced within specific situations that come in many shapes and sizes.

      Liked by 2 people

  5. The whole process of forgiveness acts as a cleansing agent.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. GS says:

      Letting go of grudges and bitterness can make way for improved health and peace of mind. Forgiveness can lead to: Healthier relationships. Improved mental health. Forgiveness can give us the strength to let go of the past and be optimistic for the future. We all deal with unhealed wounds from time to time, but forgiveness can free us from the pain associated with those wounds. Forgiveness acts as a healing agent and sets us free from such bondage.

      Liked by 1 person

    1. GS says:

      Thank you for sharing

      Liked by 2 people

      1. Always a pleasure to read and share your posts, Dear
        xoxox ๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ’•๐ŸŽ๐Ÿ˜Š๐ŸŒน

        Liked by 2 people

      2. GS says:

        ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿผ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿผ

        Liked by 1 person

  6. Forgiveness is all about letting go

    Liked by 2 people

    1. GS says:

      Forgiveness does not mean you erase the past, or forget what has happened. It doesn’t even mean the other person will change his behavior โ€” you cannot control that. All it means is that you are letting go of the anger and pain, and moving on to a better place. It’s not easy.

      Liked by 1 person

  7. MAY says:

    This is soo essential
    Thank you for this post ๐Ÿ™๐Ÿพ

    Liked by 1 person

    1. GS says:

      Most welcome. Psychologists generally define forgiveness as a conscious, deliberate decision to release feelings of resentment or vengeance toward a person or group who has harmed you, regardless of whether they actually deserve your forgiveness.

      Just as important as defining what forgiveness is, though, is understanding what forgiveness is not. Experts who study or teach forgiveness make clear that when you forgive, you do not gloss over or deny the seriousness of an offense against you. Forgiveness does not mean forgetting, nor does it mean condoning or excusing offenses. Though forgiveness can help repair a damaged relationship, it doesnโ€™t obligate you to reconcile with the person who harmed you, or release them from legal accountability.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. MAY says:

        Exactly
        Thank you for this ๐Ÿ™๐Ÿพ

        Liked by 1 person

      2. GS says:

        Most welcome

        Liked by 1 person

    1. GS says:

      Thank you for sharing

      Liked by 1 person

  8. the greatvincent says:

    Forgive but don’t forget.self love is atmost important for healing.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. GS says:

      It’s the best form of healing. Self-love helps you move on with ease when you truly look back on certain experiences or certain people and realize you’re better off without them, you’re better off without their judgments, you’re better off without their breadcrumbs and you’re better off without their toxic energy.

      Liked by 1 person

  9. BeyondEyes says:

    Bravo! So thoughtfully written! Thank you for sharing.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. GS says:

      In his book, Social Intelligence, Daniel Goleman reminds us that studies of people posthostility reveal that every time they merely think of the group they hate, their own body responds with pent-up anger. It floods with stress hormones, raising their blood pressure and impairing their immune effectiveness. Whereas forgiving someone weโ€™ve held a grudge against reverses the biological reaction. It lowers our blood pressure, heart rate, and levels of stress hormones and it lessens our pain and depression.
      When we can forgive other people, we are releasing our own hostility as well, so webenefit just as they do.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. BeyondEyes says:

        That’s a very interesting concept I find. Because the fine line between forgiving without forgetting and forgiving without excusing is very hard to define and execute.

        Especially when the person/people are really important and close to us.
        It is true and I see myself too how much it affects our mind and body everytime we think about the deeds or person who hurt us knowingly or unknowingly.

        However, it’s a process requiring a never ending effort.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. GS says:

        Yes us humans are a never ending effort. We are all a work in progress all our lives.

        Liked by 1 person

  10. shayandas says:

    A very well penned piece. Your words are so very true.. Thanks for sharing๐Ÿ’–

    Liked by 1 person

    1. GS says:

      โ€œThere is an enormous physical burden to being hurt and disappointed,โ€ says Karen Swartz, M.D., director of the Mood Disorders Adult Consultation Clinic at The Johns Hopkins Hospital. Chronic anger puts you into a fight-or-flight mode, which results in numerous changes in heart rate, blood pressure and immune response. Those changes, then, increase the risk of depression, heart disease and diabetes, among other conditions. Forgiveness, however, calms stress levels, leading to improved health.

      Like

  11. Kitty Minaj says:

    I am trying to learn about forgive because I realized that all the time I thought I forgave people was just a patch. Instead I took the fault upon my self and now I am felt so much resentment. It so hard to deal with. I am always anger at everyone and everything. So I decided to research about forgive and learn to practice until I actual forgive. And enjoyed your post, its filled with great information I can use. Thank you so much.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. GS says:

      Most welcome Kitty. I am glad the post resonated with you. Acknowledge your emotions about the harm done to you and how they affect your behavior, and work to release them. Choose to forgive the person who’s offended you. Move away from your role as victim and release the control and power the offending person and situation have had in your life. I know its difficult but trying is the best we have to offer.

      Liked by 1 person

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