Changing your mind is changing your relationships
Being authentic and peaceful with you relatives is only a thought away. You can learn to change your thoughts by intending to create authentic and peaceful feelings within yourself. No one is capable of making you upset without you consent, and you have given your consent too frequently in the past. When you begin practising the intention to be authentic and peaceful, you withdraw your consent to be in the lower energy. You connect to peace itself, and decide to bring peace to your relatives, thereby immediately gaining the power to change the energy of family gatherings.
Think of the relatives whom you’ve blamed for your feelings of anxiety, annoyance, or depression. You’ve focused on what you disliked about them or how they treated you, and your relationship has always had an uncomfortable edge to it. Now imagine yourself doing this from a new point of view : Rather than reacting to their low energy of hostility or bragging with a hostile or bragging reaction of your own, lowering the energy field for everyone involved – you instead bring your intention of peace to the interaction.
Reference : The Power of Intention. Dr. Wayne W. Dyer.