How to Become More Charismatic

Let’s face it, we all wish we knew someone with greater charisma. Originally meaning a “divinely gifted force or talent,” charisma comes from the Greek word charis (!). The good news is that you don’t need to please the gods to win friends or exert influence over others. Charismatic personality traits can be taught, according to science.

Here are few simple tips which if practised can add more charisma to your personality :

  1. Make people feel important. Here’s how :
  • Make eye contact
  • Offer a specific compliment
  • Ask good questions
  • Be interested, not interesting
  • Follow up
  • Remember name(s)
  • Recall something you discussed

2. Pause before speaking

  • In order to fill a pause during a speech without it sounding awkward, we give ourselves only 30% of the time that a listener would give us.
  • You have more time to reply than you think.
  • Wait for 2 seconds first
  • Pause in speaking + eye contact = confidence

3. Hone your body language

  • People will like/dislike your communication based on :
    – 7% words
    – 38% tonality and face
    – 55% body language
  • Make eye contact, pull your shoulders back, smile, and extend a firm handshake while standing up straight.

4. Use humour

  • A study of the top TED talks found humorous as a key ingredient. People are drawn to those who make them feel good (aided by humour).
  • 3 tips to become funnier – give a surprising answer, care more than someone predicted, and be more specific than necessary.

5. Don’t complain or gossip. Ever

  • Nobody like to hear complaining. So why do we do it ourselves?
  • Respectfully standing up for yourself is different. Separately, when you talk about others, people wonder if you talk bad about them too. Just don’t do it.

6. The shadow rule

  • To be accepted by others, you don’t have to hide aspects of who you are. Think about your favourite movie or TV character. They have at least one weakness. You wouldn’t like them as much otherwise. Imperfection is humanising. Own your flaws, be magnetic.

For more information, check out – Charisma on Command by Charlie Houpert


16 Comments Add yours

  1. Cheerui says:

    Thanks for this informative piece…. Looks like something worth consistently working on and improving…..

    Liked by 1 person

    1. GS says:

      Oh absolutely Cheerui.


  2. Anjali says:

    You wrote something that people really needs to understand and inculcate in their personality. Thanks for sharing this with us.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. GS says:

      Most welcome Anjali
      Glad you liked the post. We need to keep working on ourselves to survive in this world:)

      Liked by 1 person

  3. My Rollercoaster Journey says:

    Great post! I’m socially awkward, so these are very useful tips. Can I repost this?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. GS says:

      Please feel free to repost. I am glad you liked the post.


      1. My Rollercoaster Journey says:

        Thank you!

        Liked by 1 person

  4. gpavants says:

    Hi Garima,

    Yes, we could all use this. Battling with depression has made this ten times worse. However we all need to not go back in that shell.

    I hope you are good. I was concerned about our last message. Hard times can weigh on us all.



    Liked by 1 person

    1. GS says:

      Gary, thank you for checking in. There is only one way out of this: through it. I’m hoping to come out shining at the end.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. gpavants says:

        Yes, walking through by God’s grace day by day.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. GS says:


        Liked by 1 person

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