We have all felt shame at one time or another. Maybe we were teased for mispronouncing a common word or for how we looked in a bathing suit, or perhaps a loved one witnessed us telling a lie. Shame is the uncomfortable sensation we feel in the pit of our stomach when it seems we have no safe haven from the judging gaze of others. We feel small and bad about ourselves and wish we could vanish. Although shame is a universal emotion, how it affects mental health and behavior is not self-evident.
In this post we will look at some of the expressions & actions of shame :
- Hiding behaviour or a characteristic from other people.
- Avoiding the person you have harmed.
- Avoiding persons who have criticised you.
- Avoiding yourself, distracting, ignoring
- Withdrawing; covering the face
- Bowing your head, groveling.
- Appeasing; saying you are sorry over and over and over.
- Looking down and away from others
- Sinking back; slumped and rigid posture
- Halting speech, lowered volume while talking
Here are some after effects of shame :
- Avoiding thinking about your transgression; shutting down; blocking all emotions.
- Engaging in distracting, impulsive behaviours to divert your mind or attention.
- High amount of “self-focus”; preoccupation with yourself.
- Depersonalisation, dissociative experiences, numbness, or shock
- Attacking or blaming others
- Conflicts with other people
- Isolation, feeling alienated
- Impairment in problem solving ability
Want to conquer shame? Learn more about this difficult emotions here > https://empress2inspire.blog/2021/01/31/understanding-shame-part-2/