Stop the Drama Part 3

Regardless of your ideological views or political persuasion, these are turbulent times around the world. I’ve noticed a sense of angst, heightened anxiety, and a palpable change in how people treat each other personally and professionally. It’s time to get back to what distinguishes us as human beings – treating one another with compassion, dignity, and respect. Even those with whom we disagree the most deserve to be treated with care. We moved around the triangle until one of us moves out and into a clear and healthy communication pattern. Be the one. Be the change you want in the conversation.

Let’s look at the Rescuer (Saviour) in the conversation :

  • “You need my help”
  • “You’re not okay but I am nice and will fix you”
  • Provides you support when doesn’t want to.
  • Feels guilty and anxious if doesn’t rescue.
  • Feels connected when victim of dependent.
  • Rescuing creates sense of being capable.
  • Often expects to fall in rescue mission.

How to Move to coach with clear support :

  • Give the message – “I care about you and I know you are capable.”
  • Do nothing that thee other can do for him or herself – “I know you can do this.”
  • Active Listen – “I am willing to listen to your problem without making it mine to solve.
  • State boundaries – “I am willing to listen for twenty minutes.”
  • Provide Choices – “I will listen for fifteen minutes now or you may call back next Tuesday. You choose.”

Hope this helped.

Reference :

9 Comments Add yours

    1. GS says:

      Thank you for sharing.


      1. susankgray says:

        Yep, it is surely time to stop the drama! Let’s put the “civil” in civilization! You know, for the future.

        Thanks for the clear words of advice! Very helpful. Take care!

        Liked by 1 person

      2. GS says:

        Most welcome Susan. I am glad you liked the post. There are situations that, upon further inspection, have nothing to do with you. You are not responsible for the actions of others, so beating yourself up about something that someone else does is counterproductive and pushes you further away from your own inner peace.

        Liked by 1 person

  1. Good Points to remember. I have found that empathizing and reflecting back what the person is trying to communicate, facilitates in establishing a good rapport.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. GS says:

      Yes that’s a great point. Do an honest self-appraisal of the situations that make you feel threatened. What is it about these situations that makes you feel that way? Process your thoughts carefully and drill down until you get to the root of the matter, going below the symptom-level. We’re not talking stress, that’s evident. Instead, what specifically is stressing you out? That’s your cycle.

      Liked by 1 person

    1. GS says:

      Thank you for sharing

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Always a joy and pleasure to read and share your posts with followers, My Dear! Have a great day!! xoxox 😘💕🎁🌹

        Liked by 1 person

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