Stop Being Hard On Yourself

It’s just all too easy to hold ourselves to high standards, and then get frustrated if we fail to meet them. I know I have done this before, and, at the risk of sounding defeatist, I know I will do it at some point again.

Perhaps the key to silencing the enemy within is accepting that it is there–that we all possess both darkness and light within us–and then learning to create a higher ratio of self-affirming to self-diminishing thoughts. Maybe the goal shouldn’t be to always be positive, but to recognize when we start being self-critical so that we can shift our thoughts more quickly and effectively with each internal struggle

Here are few ways on how to stop being hard on yourself

1. Separate yourself from the problem : The problem is an event in your life. It isn’t who you are. Problems don’t make you bad.

2. Keep it to the issue at hand : When you notice yourself leaving the current issue and overgeneralizing your mistakes to “everything” stop, take a breath, and remind yourself of the issue at hand.

3. Change to more accurate thoughts : Shift your thinking from what you did wrong to what you did and do right. What are your strengths? What are your skills?

4. Act : To get unstuck, use your mistake in a positive way, to motivate you, help you shape your goals, and take action to accomplish those goals. 

So what do you think? Will you use these steps and try to take a chill pill next time your self criticize too much?  Which one did you like the most? Do leave a comment. 


22 replies »

  1. I’ve learnt to take a couple of deep breaths before reacting in situations that trigger me to self criticise. It’s a habit that has been hard to master but I’m getting there. Whenever a mistake is made it’s an opportunity for growth 😊

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Hello Empress,

    Our negative thoughts do want to have dominance. It is so true that getting to the core issue and not let it ruin your day is important. Sometimes it’s just calling it what it is, “I am jealous in this situation.”. Then of course I pray to have wisdom and strength to let it go. I hope you have that direction, too.



    Liked by 1 person

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