Your self-esteem is influenced by how much you value yourself for what you are, that is your self-worth and not what or how much material possessions you have. Your self-worth comes from within you, and is not dependent on others for it. Your self-worth is not less than another person’s who can do something which you can’t. Self-worth arises from your own thorough evaluation of yourself to identify and confirm the values that are intrinsic to your nature and character.
Here are a few ways in which we all sabotage our self esteem sometimes knowingly and sometime unknowingly :
- Negativity – It’s the first thing you need to deal with. You must stamp it out. I cannot stress this enough. It’s contagious too. The truth is we can all be positive for an hour, a day, or even a week. It’s staying positive that’s hard. It involves training your brain to recognise, react and deal with negative thoughts. It’s essential negative thoughts before they spiral out of control. Negativity will happily overtake your desire to be more confident and boost your self -esteem.
- Self Worth – Do you spend countless hours wishing you could fix yourself? Maybe you think; my nose is too big, I am too fat, I am boring. Do you seek approval for everything you do? Maybe you convince yourself that you are not worthy of your friends or that you don’t deserve to be happy. There’s only one answer to this (And there’s no getting out of it if you want to move forward and build your self esteem) you’ll need to learn to have self-love. That can be a really scary thought for some people and one of the hardest challenges they face on their journey. You’ll need to work hard at this if you want to move on. The truth is that unless you take charge of yourself you will be your own worst enemy.
- Self Doubt – Too many very capable people lack faith in their own abilities. This stops them doing the things that they really want to do. The main reason for this? A fear of failure. The thought of getting it wrong is enough to stop them doing it. Self doubt usually stems from someone else. A parent or teacher perhaps. A seed is sown, often in childhood. That seed grows and raises its head whenever a challenge arises. Fearing failure is not all bad. A little self doubt can be a good thing. It can increase the amount of effort you are willing to exert to achieve your goal. It can actually spur you on if you allow it to.
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