Types of Parental Attachment

In pediatrics, attachment is the emotional connection that develops between a young child and a parent or other caregiver.

Attachment theory was developed in the mid-20th century by a British psychiatrist, John Bowlby, whose own upper-class British upbringing included the loss of a beloved nanny, and an early trip to boarding school. Attachment theory relates to the emotional bond that connects an in fact to the main person taking care of them (usually their mother). The way in which a mother reacts to the behaviour of her child is of utmost importance as it determines whether this child will be able to count on her and feel safety and comfort.

Here are the 4 types of mother-child attachment styles

  • Secure Attachment – The mother is direct, sensitive, consistent and supportive. She thinks that she will cover the needs of her child. She hopes that she will be able to do it. The child feels safe and confident enough to explore their surroundings, they start having faith in their abilities, they learn how to be resilient and they learn how to be independent.
  • Avoidant Attachment – The mother is distant, inactive, dismissive, critical and irritable/eager to punish. She subconsciously feels that she does not provide for her child’s needs. The child often feels rejected, they often suffer from emotional isolation and they feel stressed and scared.
  • Ambivalent Attachment – The mother is inconsistent, often indifferent and often sensitive. She can’t provide for her child’s needs. The child often feels stressed and insecure, they are angry, they experience emotional abandonment, they can’t control their impulsivity & they are unsociable and aggressive.
  • Disorganised Attachment – The mother exaggerates, is unpredictable, inspires fear, a drug addict and suffers from a mental disorder. She is very confused and cannot draw up a strategy to cover her child’s needs. The child feels very scared and sad, they approach strangers trying to find safety, they have low self esteem, they feel angry and are passive.

Reference : https://upbility.net/blogs/news/mother-child-attachment

20 Comments Add yours

  1. I am not a parent, but I am an observer of human interaction, as well all are to some degree. My sense is that “secure attachment” involves a parent spiritually and psychologically seeing the space expanded beyond her self (and persons in that space including most especially her child) as integral to her self. Her life is not principally existing in her head or her body but in her movements (actions and reactions) in this greater space. Without this expanded approach of the self, the self collapses into ones own head/body, and this results in a permutation of narcissism. What I am suggesting here is phenomenological, of course, and is a philosophical answer to deconstructionism. It applies to abstract philosophy but more poignantly to human interaction, including that between a parent and her own child. Thank you for bringing parental attachment to our attention in the manner you have done so today with your blog post.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. GS says:

      Thank you Michael for your thoughts. I am glad you liked the post.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Gonzov krik iz getribe autizma says:

    What about the importance of having ‘an always there for you’ father? This is why we the growling males are created. To give the initial spark and keep the warmth of the camp fire when ‘mummy’ is drained or is not subtable, or able to provide the emotional support every child needs. In”the male oriented soceity we are suppose to live in the role of the father is as under-preciated as is the women’s at her workplace (well that’s what they say and I am too scared to say otherwise😂). Emotional inteligence is though a trait you get from mummy much more then you’re able from your pappy. It’s nature’s way? No. It’s the way we structured our society.If a man is emotional he is portrayed as sissy or gay. Maybe if we change this mother-child bond will be eased of the bourdain mothers are condemed to endure: if a child is a wreckless ram, emotional, blunt and a Bart😂 it must be his mothers fault.
    Well in my case it ain’t. I am what I am because I chose to be what I am. My mother gave me enough distance to create a mind of my own. So you see psychology like any other science ain’t egzact. Sorry for rambling but I like this topic🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. GS says:

      I am glad you shared your thoughts on the topic. There is nothin wrong or right in this world.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Gonzov krik iz getribe autizma says:

        Well it hit the spot🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      2. GS says:

        🙏🏼🙏🏼

        Like

  3. Thanks for this insightful post. I’m learning about the types of parental attachment for the first time. My baby is 6 months and some. He’s a lot clingy at present. Could parental attachment be related to separation anxiety in any way?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. GS says:

      Longitudinal analyses showed that ambivalent attachment was most consistently related to social anxiety. Concurrent measures of attachment and social anxiety showed that lower attachment security and higher ambivalent attachment were most consistently related to higher social anxiety.

      Like

  4. B. Ray says:

    Thank you for educating us! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. GS says:

      Glad you liked the post.

      Like

  5. I remember studying this when I was in school. I’ve always found it to be interesting because I try to see if the scenario is one that fits me.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. GS says:

      Oh great. Do you have any insights?

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Well, my mother was not very affectionate. However, my grandmother was the opposite and I always tended to gravitate towards her. I use to struggle with how my mother was my grandmother’s child because there was no connection for me. So I was more attached to my grandmother than I was to my mother because that’s where I received my nurturing. Now that my grandmother is gone, there’s a void even though my mother has tried to show affection. It feels awkward because I haven’t really lived within this close proximity to her in almost 30 years. So it’s a little difficult to accept.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. GS says:

        That is understandable. It is what it is. Love & Forgiveness is key.

        Liked by 1 person

      3. Yes, they are. Life is too short and it is the right thing to do.

        Liked by 1 person

  6. I feel blessed to have a mother who was very secure in sharing her love and care in raising six children with my father.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. GS says:

      Glad to hear that. I have been blessed with such a mother too.

      Like

  7. Carol anne says:

    attachment is so, so important, its vital! I have an attachment disorder, due to being a premature baby, and being in the NICU for 3 months with little to no contact. Attachment disorders are tough to deal with. xoxo

    Liked by 1 person

    1. GS says:

      Although an attachment is a “tie,” it is not synonymous with love and affection, despite their often going together and a healthy attachment is considered to be an important foundation of all subsequent relationships.

      Like

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