I’ve discovered that standing out from the crowd is a big part of attracting people. When we do things differently than most, there’s something irresistible and even mysterious about it. That is not to say that everything we do that is unique will attract others. Here are some examples of things that most people avoid but are often very appealing to others:

Please do not interrupt.
It’s such a simple concept. However, it is not an easy task. Many people don’t even realise it when they do it, but they interrupt out of insecurity, not to be rude. When we interrupt, we unintentionally communicate our sense of inadequacy. We want to be noticed. So we undermine the attention that others are receiving in order to steal some for ourselves. This is low-status behaviour that will cost you respect. Allow people their space. Leaders do things like this. They are not in a hurry and are content to let others take the spotlight.

Learn to be an expert in one area.
It is unusual to develop a higher-than-average level of skill for something. It demonstrates tenacity and grit that many people lack. Whether it’s mastering juggling or reaching higher levels of achievement as an artist, teacher, dancer, writer, or sailor, your uniqueness is highlighted. Achieving higher skill levels is appealing to many people in the same way that achieving celebrity status is.

Display an unusual aspect of your appearance.
Being a little different on the outside doesn’t have to mean walking around like a goofy freak gimmick. Subtlety triumphs here, especially in a world where everyone is tripping over themselves to stand out by emphasising appearance. Wear something that challenges others’ expectations of someone like you. You could dress normally like everyone else but wear a unique watch, bracelet, or socks. It is more likely to be remembered if it is unexpected.
Memorable things frequently increase your perceived value, which is often appealing.

Develop complete non-resistance to criticism.
The majority of people are quick to take things personally. Someone may criticise them, or they may interpret events incorrectly. They appear agitated or annoyed. They may become silent (as was often my style when I took things personally growing up). This display of insecurity based on a thought-created interpretation of events is a waste of energy, consumes you from within, is immature, and ultimately unattractive. Those who have grown accustomed to being criticised and who gently smile when insulted are not pushovers. They simply do not see the link between what others think and their own happiness. They no longer seek approval and are unaffected by insult. This is extremely appealing.

Share something that requires bravery to share.
People who earn a lot of respect by sharing something vulnerable do so because it takes bravery. But, why? It takes courage to reveal things about yourself that make you appear less than perfect or socially acceptable. But it does not end there. This is where some people get confused. It’s not about being vulnerable for the sake of being vulnerable. If that worked, we’d all be complaining about our acne or our buttocks.

When vulnerability serves a positive purpose, it is respected.
That is strength when I am willing to appear ‘inferior’ in order to demonstrate a point that will ultimately benefit others. You can tell me, for example, that you still get nervous before interviews, but you tell me so that I feel encouraged. You are demonstrating your humanity while lifting me. That requires bravery and positions you as an example-setting leader, not a loser.

Be a jerk from time to time.
There’s a big difference between being a relentless, consistent dick and being a dick on occasion. Most people are doing everything they can to appear nice, harmless, and completely unoffensive. In their efforts to be nice, they frequently unintentionally drain all of their souls, slipping into the background thanks to their vanilla exterior. Being cocky and cheeky will set you apart. You don’t always have to be nice to people if you do it in a playful manner. People appreciate this. Go against the grain, be a little naughty, and people will fall in love with you.

Be present.
Take note of how present people are in the conversation the next time you observe people interacting. People are frequently found in places other than the interaction. People are lost in thought. They’re either self-conscious and fidgety, or they’re thinking about whether they forgot to turn off the iron at home, or they’re planning something clever to say next.

They are not actually present.
Being present with someone, truly listening to what they say, and absorbing what they say will set you apart. People will be surprised at how well they feel heard even if you barely speak. People are sensitive to the presence of others. Be silent. Be present. This will draw people to you, and they may not even realise why.

What do you do to attract people in your life? Do share.

Hi, I’m Garima and I write about life experiences. I have several books available on Amazon. Here’s a link to my author page – https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B0BQDZXYNV. Check them out today! Any purchases or KDP reads will be greatly appreciated. If you like my books, do leave a review.