Don’t take anything personally acts as a measure of presence in the here and now. Simply, when we are reactive we are not in the moment and when we are checked out, are susceptible to taking others actions as personal affronts. The bigger truth is nothing others do is because of us. It is their story of pain being projected based on distorted beliefs and limiting opinions. Miguel-Ruiz describes this as “poison” and if it is taken personally, you take that poison in and it becomes yours. When we assume this poison is true, it becomes our poison or baggage. However, when we are grounded and centered, can see the projection for what it is, we are far less vulnerable to others projections. Miguel-Ruiz describes this as immunity in the center of hell; it is the ‘gift’ of this agreement.
Here are few steps which you can take to stop taking things personally
- Realize that other people’s rudeness is not about you. When someone is rude it’s likely to be a reflection of their own issues.
- Ask yourself what else the comment or behaviour might mean. For example, if someone doesn’t smile or say hello, they might be shy.
- Take comments or criticism in a constructive way. Ask yourself if there’s any truth to it, and what you can learn.
- Take a different perspective. Ask yourself how an unbiased outsider would see the situation.
- Realize that you can’t please everyone.
- Know that you’re not defined by your mistakes or criticism.
- Realize that your self-worth depends on you. It does not depend on what others say about you.
Living this agreement creates openness to say yes or no without guilt or criticism. Thus, you can be surrounded by the chaos of life and remain peaceful. Hope this helped. Leave me a comment.