You intended to interact and co-create with other humans when you made the decision to focus here in this physical time space reality because you understood that all joyous motion forward requires a variety of viewpoints from which to expand. You knew that by interacting with others, new ideas or desires were hatched from these co creative experiences, the potential for joy was a sure thing whenever you individually or collectively focused in the direction of those new ideas.
When you want to be joyful and you remember that you joy is not dependent upon the behaviour of others, and you consistently look for good feeling subject will be satisfied. But, from your place of not feeling good, as you worry about not finding a mate, or notice that you are unhappy with the one you have, your desire for a good relationship cannot come to you because you are not a vibrational match to your own desire.
Whether you are without a mate and trying to find one or unhappy with the mate you currently have, your work is the same, you must find thoughts about the relationship that harmonise with the thoughts your Inner Being has about your relationship. If the strongest vibration you are offering about relationships, is about the absence of the relationship that you desire, then it is not possible for the presence of the relationship that you desire to come into your experience. The Vibrations are too far apart. You cannot find the solution to any problem when the problem is the most active vibration within you.
Reference : The Vortex. Esther and Jerry Hicks.