In the office, managing problematic people is a difficult responsibility. Indeed, it is simpler said than done! But, it is possible to handle them when you understand basic human psychology and strive to modify their conduct through soft skills. In this regard, we will explore assertiveness, handling tough individuals, and discovering techniques to handle them with the help of soft skills. The topic of assertiveness is one that is frequently discussed at work. A lot of times, assertiveness and aggression are confused. The art of assertiveness is the ability to refuse without sacrificing one’s rights or hurting other people.

It is the skill of gently but forcefully rejecting something. It says “I am ok and you are ok” when someone is assertive. In contrast, aggressiveness depicts ‘I am ok but you are not ok’ and submissiveness describes ‘I am not ok but you are ok’. Of the three scenarios, assertiveness ultimately makes it possible for people to live stress- and conflict-free lives. In a word, assertiveness creates a situation where everyone involved can comfortably achieve their aims and objectives.
According to research, poor communication is to blame for eighty percent of problems encountered at work. Effective communication depends on assertiveness. When people speak assertively the message can be carried through properly, positively, and peacefully.

“When dealing with people, keep in mind that you are dealing with creatures of emotion, beings bristling with prejudice, and creatures motivated by ego and vanity.” (Dale Carnegie). For these reasons, businesses hold assertiveness training programmes to help workers work peacefully and effectively. Martin Luther King Jr., Mahatma Gandhi, and Winston Churchill were all strong leaders. They were effective leaders because they did not stray from their values. Winston Churchill played a crucial role in bringing about the defeat of the Second World War through aggressive communication, just as Martin Luther King Jr. and Mahatma Gandhi did for the liberation of India. As a result, assertiveness is a fundamental component of good leadership.

Assertiveness to settle disputes – Several strategies are used by people to settle disputes. Some people shy away from or avoid conflict because they lack confidence. Some people do not want to cause harm to others by hitting them, which causes them to suffer in silence. Some people advocate retaliating violently. That is a situation of tit for tat. Yet other people are able to convince others to view a subject from a variety of angles by using their cool, logical thinking. They are confident individuals. People differ in nature, and this difference is reflected in how they approach conflict. In a word, those who are submissive avoid conflict and endure suffering in silence. Those that behave aggressively cause harm to others by showing no concern for them.

Those that are aggressive have empathy for others and achieve a balance between respecting others and defending themselves. Those who have been suppressed for a long time eventually erupt violently. That is mainly because they long neglected to defend their rights, opinions, and ideals. Such actions have a negative impact on health and trigger despair. Contrarily, persons who consistently dominate and dictate to others without regard for their feelings, opinions, or ideas will be despised by others. Conflicts are everywhere resorted to by such aggressive persons. They pose a risk to the harmony and tranquilly within the company. These individuals use unfavourable body language. Here are some tips and methods for assertiveness.

1. Without hurting other people, express your feelings in a respectful, upbeat, and forceful manner.
2. Become a good listener to develop empathy. A deeper knowledge of other people’s perspectives is made possible by attentive listening, which promotes assertive communication.
3. Be unbiased, precise, and transparent in your approach.
4. Be calm and collected. Keep your composure. Recognize that relationships take years to develop but only a few seconds to destroy.
5. Use a confident body language to communicate your position.
   6.To help the other person understand what you are saying, you can have a sandwich conversation where you begin optimistically, then add your strongest arguments, and lastly finish on a good note.
6. Instead of expressing “you did like that” when you disagree with someone else’s behaviour, you may say “I did not like that”. Despite the fact that the meaning is the same, saying “I” softly diffuses the issue.
7. Investigate your options for assertiveness.
8. Make sure the other person fully understands your remarks by emphasising them again.
9. Never agree to a request that is unreasonable or unfair.
10. In your free time, work on assertiveness through inner dialogue.
11. Regularly practise meditation to keep your thoughts and emotions under control.
12. Seek advice regarding your behaviour from your reliable pals to make changes.
13. Always consider a win-win scenario rather than a win-lose or lose-win scenario.

It is not a conflict, but in the end, cooperation benefits everyone. In the business sector, assertiveness is essential for cooperation. It is time individuals acknowledged the value and significance of assertiveness skills. It serves as the cornerstone for developing leadership skills. History has often shown that “right” ultimately prevails over “might,” not the reverse. As assertiveness reduces confrontations and increases productivity, it is essential for thriving in the job.

How to deal with challenging people – You need to first understand your personality in order to deal with challenging people. You must behave assertively and project a positive body language. Here are some methods for dealing with challenging people.

1. To break the ice, smile.
2. Keep your composure. Remain calm.
3. To minimise confusion, pay close attention while listening.
4. Be confident. Keep your body language positive. Remain upbeat and optimistic. Deal with the behaviour, not the person.
   Break the blockages with laughter.
5. Avoid defending yourself when you receive criticism. Prepare to take action rather than just react. Be optimistic and helpful in your approach.
6. Show sympathy for others. See from others’ views for a minute to address the conflicts.
7. Instruct them that the group’s aims and objectives are crucial, and emphasise them.
8. Be adaptable. There isn’t a certain way to deal with tough people. Apply different strokes to break barriers and build bridges.
9. Don’t try to ignore the problems. Deal with troublesome individuals by speaking to them in an empathic feedback

Despite your best efforts, if addressing tough individuals using soft skills does not result in a favourable conclusion, you might need to utilise negative motivation to make things right for everyone. Recognise that each person is unique, with their own emotions, egos, and feelings. Conflicts will inevitably arise as long as there are individuals there. There are always variations in people’s beliefs, attitudes, perceptions, abilities, and methods. Thus, it is necessary to avert conflicts through effective and efficient communication. Conflicts would turn into a crisis if they weren’t resolved. In order to resolve problems, consider the similarities rather than the differences between people. Everyone will have something in common that will make life serene, enjoyable, and memorable.

Hi, I’m Garima and I write about life experiences. I have several books available on Amazon. Check them out today! Any purchases or KDP reads will be greatly appreciated. If you like my books, do leave a review. Here’s my author page on Amazon – https://www.amazon.com/-/e/B0BQDZXYNV