It is important to take ample time to heal.
Silence conveys power and authority. When you’ve had enough of the current situation, communication is improved. when pragmatism fails to accomplish its goal and speech becomes like trampled and dried sand. Excuses lose their credibility and meaning. Comfort is felt in the absence of sound. You can sometimes talk too much. You over-explain yourself without knowing if it will help. when you’re lost and nothing gives you a wonderful feeling. Words are overflowing in your mind and clamouring to be released. You bolt the door because you are unable to articulate any of them. You remain mute as you withdraw internally into the quiet seclusion of your thoughts, where you find room to be who you are.
When someone doesn’t grasp something, doesn’t acknowledge it, or simply stays silent, it says a lot. When words are insufficient to fully explain concepts to deaf ears, it is the loudest sound there is. When it is too painful to speak, the anguish speaks through. It lets them know that even if they are unaware or careless, they have hurt you. You withhold your response because of a lack of desire to do so. You don’t speak when you’re in pain. No one should ever assume they do when it comes to what you’re going through. Although you have loved without restrictions, they have caused you to lose sight of your magic. When promises fly through the air like fireworks, brilliantly coloured in their dazzling brilliance, only to fade away and vanish into the night. What used to reverberate with your soul has become drained and dead. All that’s left inside vanishes into quiet, unresponsive.
When you have to be powerful, you must be quiet. when you must defend your brokenness against the all-encompassing truth. When you’re afraid people will make fun of you or write you off as insane, you want to keep your scars and points of weakness hidden. Building barriers between yourself and them allows you to feel comfortable and at peace. In order to heal, you are at home by yourself. As you struggle to make sense of it all, silence allows you to be by yourself with your thoughts. However, you are aware deep down that the goal is acceptance more than it is finding significance. You start to comprehend why wanting something that is mostly beyond your control causes such anguish when the point is not made clear and contexts are ignored. Acceptance, not liking or wanting, is what silence is. It does not support or validate. It is not giving approval or consent. It is permitting. It’s letting go of resistance and allowing what has to happen.
When you are silent, you have had enough. Let the defending end. You’ve decided to stop sobbing and feeling depressed. Enough of discussing and arguing with them in the hopes that they will change, and knowing that there is nothing else you can say or do. Finding out why is no longer your responsibility. You’re not required to comprehend. You’re not going to. You give up trying and battling. You cease to care. You turn away after leaving the pieces on the ground. You no longer care about what is happening. The moment there is silence, you can see it for what it truly is. That thrill disappears into thin air, connections are lost, and communication has broken down. Relationships deteriorate, slowly drifting apart until the gap widens.
You stop holding onto hope and fully lose interest because there is no longer anything in common. Being silent is difficult, but facing the reality is more challenging. Instead than arguing constantly, you’d prefer to avoid the conflict. Feelings are suppressed, and happiness is given less importance. Words are no longer required. Slowly but surely, you find the confidence to leave after allowing the sadness and fury to fade. They won’t be aware of your absence if they are preoccupied and don’t notice your quietness.
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I am reminded of the Desert monks and nuns of the 3rd and 4th centuries who left the confusion and violence of “civilization” to live in the desert’s of Egypt snd Syria.
Interestingly they left behind footprints in the sand known as “Sayings”. They were still not in “silence”, yet had risen above the written word, only to have what they said resurrected in the writings of latter day “mystics”.
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Yes, Desert monks, also known as the Desert Fathers, were a group of Christian ascetics who lived in the deserts of Egypt and Syria during the 3rd to 5th centuries. They are renowned for their spiritual teachings and sayings which have been collected in various books and manuscripts over the years. These sayings provide insight into the ascetic lifestyle of these monks and offer guidance on how to live a life of faith. They serve as an inspirational source for many today, providing wisdom on topics such as humility, patience, and self-control.