Healing and Finding Love Again

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Your sense of self, perception of reality, and level of self-esteem can all be severely impacted by being romantically associated with a narcissist. The aftermath of this breakup is unlike any other. You understand if you are familiar with the subject.

You may question whether there is a core issue with you following a narcissistic attachment. Not at all. Moreover, you can ponder whether it’s conceivable to fall in love once more. (It is.) Even worse than what happened, not because of it, it’s feasible that your subsequent romantic encounters will be. Despite the fact that I wouldn’t want anyone to go through a narcissistic relationship, I am aware that such a relationship has the power to make us aware of our blind spots. Some of the characteristics that make us well-liked in interpersonal interactions and help us succeed in work relationships could not be helpful to us in romantic relationships. Furthermore, a narcissist, someone who is eager to take advantage of our generosity for their own gain finds these characteristics to be catnip. Several of the qualities include:

  • Eagerness to please in order to feel liked and chosen.
  • Assuming more duty than is necessary to establish our worth and draw attention to ourselves.
  • Favouring someone’s potential in a perfect world over accepting their current behaviour.
  • To feel accepted and safe, we strive to be flawless.

You can establish better boundaries, higher standards, and a strong sense of self-worth by learning to love yourself. which in turn aid in developing superior partner-selection abilities so you can unwind during the wooing process and genuinely enjoy yourself when you put yourself back out there. Undoubtedly, getting over a challenging romantic experience could require treatment. However, once you’re prepared to reenter the dating scene, here are some suggestions to help you maintain your wellbeing as you make sensible decisions.

  1. Put the spotlight back on you. When you begin dating again, it can be tempting and common to concentrate on warning signs and medical conditions. I’ve known folks who, after a relationship ended, spent years studying dysfunctional personalities. Additionally, while an early learning phase might be beneficial, it can also become unfocused. Your own intuition is the most accurate compass you have. People frequently say that despite their early intuition that something wasn’t right, they went on. They’ll confess, “Well, I wasn’t actually attracted to them at first.” Or, “When they did that, I found it odd, but I rationalised my thoughts by telling myself I was being ridiculous and my friend that I was being too picky.” Try to develop compassion and forgiveness for yourself rather than making a never-ending list of red flags. In the event that you were duped, it is not your fault. There is nothing shameful about having a good and giving heart. We begin to trust in our capacity to navigate life and love once more the moment we get past self-criticism and assigning blame.
  2. Choose to be treasured. Move on. It does not mean that you will always suffer the same consequences if a narcissist has once caused you harm. Think about what moving forward means for you. This is crucial: you must consider how a healthy relationship would feel and look, not merely how it would be different from the last time. Here are some issues to think about: What wholesome components of a passionate, loving connection would make you personally flourish? What wants and desires do you have? What are your criteria? Not what you believe is possible for you, but what is actually necessary to grant someone close access to you? Do you, for instance, feel the safest with a mature, sensitive partner? Are you spiritual at your core? Do you want someone who will be fully committed to your relationship and to you no matter what else is going on in their life? Are you hoping to start a family and live a life with someone? Do you demand particular prudence in your communication, clarity in your intentions, and regularity in your affection? When we explicitly state our needs and wants, we could also become aware of the fact that, inseparably, we might not feel deserving of being loved or having what we yearn for. The conscious mind frequently cannot understand it. We all desire love, after all. On the inside, though, there are obstacles that prevent us from investing in opportunities that provide us with more than we deserve. We can recognise these internal impediments to love by our propensity for people-pleasing, performance, and overfunctioning. Symptoms include: feeling bad about turning down unwelcome attention, disobeying our gut feelings, or speaking negatively to ourselves frequently. We can dissolve any of our obstacles with gentle self-awareness and self-compassion.
  3. Make a powerful filtering mechanism. While I urge you to follow your instincts, it can also be useful to set up a formal screening method so you can weed out misaligned matches. Your filtering method will function best if you begin by considering what works and doesn’t work for you rather than by enumerating their characteristics. Take emotional attraction, physical attraction, and companionship with a long-term relationship as examples of what works and doesn’t. Whatever works for you, make sure to compare your experience with what you already understood to be crucial before meeting this new person whenever your hormones of love begin to flow. You may maintain your self-awareness and fend off dream intrusion by revisiting your filtration system.

There are many lovely people looking for love, whether you are dating in the real world or on dating apps. One of the fundamental aspects of being human is love. There are a lot of compassionate, sensitive people out there who have been humbled by their own humbling experiences and are now actively looking for a meaningful relationship connection from a place of emotional maturity.

Hello Everyone, finally published my new book “Focus”. In this book, I took a poetic licence in considering the spiritual aspect of focus, which has rarely been done. Other books focus on the practical aspect and tell you to do this and that, but in my book, I discuss how we can find focus within ourselves without relying on an action-oriented approach. Any purchases or KDP reads will be greatly appreciated. If you like my books, do leave a review. Here’s my author page on Amazon – https://amzn.eu/d/aKbYysx

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4 Comments Add yours

  1. sicetnon3 says:

    “To feel accepted and safe, we strive to be flawless.” Until we realize the perfect embraces imperfection. No striving is necessary. Everything Belongs

    Liked by 2 people

    1. GS says:

      Learning about God has also shown me that our lives are just part of a bigger picture. God loves the world. He created everything, and whether you believe it or not, it’s still true. When we become self-actualized, we want to give back.

      Liked by 2 people

      1. sicetnon3 says:

        “When we become self-actualized, we want to give back.” We might term that gratitude…

        Liked by 1 person

  2. sicetnon3 says:

    A roady for the hard rock band AC/DC once said, “God is the name of the blanket we put over mystery.” Wisdom from un-expected sources…

    Liked by 2 people

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