Get Out of the Comparison Trap
According to Theodore Roosevelt, “Comparison is the thief of joy.” And it’s now simpler than ever to do so in a connected world. We may quickly determine that individuals we don’t even know are superior to us by only a few taps and swipes. perhaps they are in front of us. Or that they are more attractive, intelligent, wealthy, or successful. You see what I mean.
I’ve learned certain coping mechanisms to use when I start thinking that someone is living their life immeasurably better than I am since I’ve spent much of my life feeling completely confined by comparison. I’ve certainly improved, even if I still occasionally fall into the trap (I am human, after all). Anyway, these are the three methods I’ve employed to squelch my impulse to compare. I’m hoping it will benefit you as well.
- Practise a perspective change when you see that you are comparing yourself to someone else once again. For instance, if your good buddy recently started dating a lovely person during the same week that you were ghosted 178 times. Perhaps you start to feel a bit envious and start to wonder, “Why do things never work out for me like that?” Alternatively, “How did they find them so easily?” Never enjoy feeling jealous, especially when it involves someone we care about and love. Most often, comparing brings it out. This is when the adjustment in perspective is useful. When you start asking demoralising questions, flip them around:
– Why do things never come together for me in such a way?” Even though it doesn’t happen as quickly as I’d want, modern dating will work out for me one day.
– How did they locate them with such ease? “I’m so happy they’ve finally found someone who is as awesome as they are!”
We reclaim our power from comparison and place it in our own hands when we change our self-defeating perspective into one that benefits us more healthily and productively.
- Consider whether what they possess is what you genuinely desire. Do you really want to be married and have children by the age of 28? By the age of 32, do you really want to be at the top of the corporate ladder? Do you really want to exercise at four in the morning every day? Do you really want to go on vacation every month? Could it be that you think these are the things you should be doing and that they look good? If so, consider whether what they possess is what you genuinely desire. Consider if you would prefer a life that looks nice to one that feels amazing. That’s the real deal. That is yours.
- Keep in mind that deadlines are nonsense. Yes, it is accurate. Complete and total nonsense, are timelines. only consider it! Because of a number of factors, each of us has a particular starting point and travels through the world in a unique way. How in the world are we to accomplish the same goals simultaneously, then? In a nutshell, it is not feasible. More thorough response: It’s your own narrative, after all. That’s what you want, don’t you? What makes you think it’s a good idea to attempt to emulate people who came before you? Or even the people who are already walking next to you? Perhaps, unlike your closest buddy, you fall in love at 32 rather than 24. It’s possible that while your closest buddy finally chooses what they want to do at age 35, your career takes off at age 26. Because they occurred at various ages, are these events any less significant? No. Who cares when it occurs if it is what you both wanted? What matters is that it occurred at all.
Since everyone of us is travelling on a unique path, comparisons ultimately don’t actually benefit us all that much. Each of us is composed of a unique history. Besides, how dull would life be if everyone took the same course? If we were doing the same thing, what would we discuss with each other? If we have already read the book ourselves, where would the fantastic stories originate from? All of this is to indicate that this is your life. Own it. Stop passing the hat around and start penning your own success tale. The world requires it. You deserve to live the life you genuinely want to live, above everything else. Any other option would be a waste.
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