Self-improvement is a contradictory process.
I once believed that having more money would improve my self-esteem. Not at all. I believed that achieving a lot of success would help me overcome my insecurities. That also didn’t take place. I believed that if I achieved enough goals, I would finally experience the highest level of satisfaction and calm. 0 for 3. The realisation that what you’re after won’t provide you what you want it to needs a little bit of success. But you ought to go after it. I’ll clarify why.
While Success Can Help, It Won’t Always Achieve Your Goals. So that you don’t think I’m going to launch into some essay about how money and achievement are pointless, I’ll cut you off there. Money is better than being in debt, no question about it. Recognization and accomplishments are significant, particularly while following a passion. You’ll have a certain amount of self-esteem and pride in what you’ve done if you are successful. However, it won’t accomplish your goals. Your soul’s emptiness won’t be filled by it. The traumatic events that shaped you in a negative way and continue to do so will not be erased. No matter how much success you have, there will always be a voice in the back of your head telling you that you are not quite good enough and that you will never be. You should strive for success in order to understand that it won’t resolve those fundamental problems. Only then will you completely understand. After that, you may come up with a strategy for handling those problems. following, go to the following action after scratching the itch.
The Cycle You Have to Go Through to Understand You are what you are because you want to be better, not the other way around. Watts, Alan. Realising that what you wanted wasn’t the whole solution teaches you what Zen practitioners have been attempting to communicate for ages. Nothing could be made better. Self-improvement instructs us to approach making the proper decision from a position of vulnerability. Being insecure is a powerful motivator. Frustration, a grudge, and the drive to prove something to someone (you know who that someone is) are all common emotions. It can help you achieve your goals. If you find that to be your preferred fuel, I advise you to use it. Although I literally just mentioned that success is partly empty, you must come to that realisation for yourself. You do, truly. You may try to have the best of both worlds once you get to a certain stage. Once you understand that success won’t make you better, you’ll cease using it as a means of attempting to do so. Another option to work on healing such scars is to try to process and let go of the trauma, engage in “shadow work,” or just stop trying to repair anything and just practise acceptance. Your decision is that. But once you give up trying to succeed for the wrong reasons, you may try to succeed for the right reasons. Alternatively, for marginally healthier motives.
What’s the Point, then? Why do I need to increase my income when I already live a happy life? Why am I still attempting to grow my company when it is already somewhat established? Why do I continue to write every day after having done so effectively for eight years? Just doing it again makes logical. The game is great. You’ll also learn to understand that. Even if the results don’t change you, the method is a tonne of fun. But it’s also painful, which will teach you a lot about yourself.
The kind of walking, living, and breathing meditation we need involves chasing success, scratching an itch, realising it wasn’t what you expected it to be, and repeating the cycle often enough to attain a more calm condition. not reciting mantras while locked up in a room…We’re not trying to appear religious by watching from the sidelines… Not phoney humility, thanks, or satisfaction…The paradoxical route of self-improvement, in which you repeatedly try to fix yourself only to realise there is nothing to correct, is the way to go if you want to become a little less dependent on approval, your ego, and the results of your life. You won’t ever understand it completely, but that isn’t the goal, so you don’t need to. To attempt is the goal. To make an effort. Then and only then will you see.
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