Whether it is a blessing or a curse, I am not sure yet.
Most likely, if you’re reading this, you’re a wonderful person who goes above and beyond to help others feel safe and at ease. And that’s a tremendous, priceless strength. You genuinely care about people enough to put them before yourself and ensure their comfort. But I’ll also explain why it can potentially be a major weakness. Two types of people are drawn to you once they discover that you will go above and beyond to do all you can for them out of the goodness of your heart:
- Those that notice this admirable quality value you and return the favour.
- People who realise they can treat you anyway they choose since you will go above and above for them.
How then do we tell the two apart? who is more likely to test us those with sincere good intentions or those looking to use us to the fullest? Pay attention is the basic solution.
It won’t be difficult to determine if someone is trying to take advantage of your generosity and compassion. They will make requests but not give the same effort in return. When you answer no, they will get upset with you or try to persuade you that your boundaries are excessive (think: you’re being unreasonable). Since this is how they keep their hold on control over you, they will do whatever it takes to make you feel guilty about your demands. For highly empathetic people, it’s common to let our compassion for the other person prevent us from standing up for ourselves or expressing our preferences. But we must keep in mind that setting clear limits with those who disregard them is acceptable and expected. When something feels wrong, we must act as our own defenders and stand up for what is right.
It’s not cruel to be our own best advocates, and being selfish in our wants doesn’t make us horrible people. We are free to be open and truthful about what violates our personal boundaries and causes us discomfort. And not everyone merits our consideration. Everyone is not deserving of our regard. We give the other person licence to take advantage of us if we don’t stand up for ourselves. Empathy is an important quality that will help you succeed. But failing to recognise when someone is being kind vs when they are taking advantage of you will also be a major setback.
“Resilience” is now PUBLISHED!!!! Knowing yourself, your thought patterns, emotional reactions, and go-to behaviours, is the foundation of good mental and emotional health. This book will teach you when to step back, take a break, and make a change. It will share suggestions on how to let go of the old, unhelpful assumptions and take the leap. Any purchases or KDP reads will be greatly appreciated. If you like my books, do leave a review. Here’s my author page on Amazon – https://a.co/d/5Rr2D4n
Be Inspired..!! 
I couldn’t agree more! It’s so important to be aware of who genuinely values us and who might take advantage of our kindness. Setting clear boundaries and standing up for ourselves is crucial, even if it feels uncomfortable at first. Remember, it’s not selfish to prioritize our own well-being and happiness. Thank you for sharing this insightful perspective!
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Most welcome Noe.
Through it all, I’ve even learned that it’s often the thoughts we hesitate to express that need to be said the most. Plus, it’s the people who don’t want to acknowledge how you feel and dismiss what you think who need to hear it most.
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Do you have your book in paperback format by any chance or will you possibly? Have a great day!
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Hi Sara, Amazon doesn’t do paperback unless the books have minimum of 75 pages which none of the current book have. Unfortunately. How can I help you read my book? Please suggest
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I am not sure if you feel comfortable doing this but I have Paypal and would love to pay you for a digital copy as I do not have a Kindle. Let me know what you think!
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Oh Sara 🥹
You brought tears to my eyes. It means a lot to me that you wish to read my book. That is something I believe any author can relate to. Here’s what I propose: you don’t have to pay anything, and I’ll email you a pdf of my book (which ends with proton.com). I hope you don’t say no. Your feedback on my book is what I will treasure most and will consider it a payment 🤍🤍
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<3……please let me pay you because you deserve it. Yes I would love to read it thoroughly and give feedback! How do you wish to exchange email here? I think you can click on my site and send me a message that way. Let me know if it works! ❤
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Yes I got your email from the website. I am going to send you the book today 🤍🤍. You may receive an email Sharma.garima..@gmail
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Are you serious? Oh my goodness please take some money from me dear! Wow that really means a lot to me that you are doing that thank you so much but please consider my offer! Have a wonderful day! ❤ ❤ ❤
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🤍🤍
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Hi Sara, just shared the PDF over email with you. Hope you like it.
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1 & 2 are reconciled though forgiveness
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You’re amazing! I’ve always put others before myself only for my mental health to deteriorate so I decided to put myself first and be a little selfish, and I feel quite better and recovering well. I do regret it sometimes but I have to do this. For myself. I loved reading this, thank you.
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I am so glad you chose you, Raya. It may not look like it but believe me you have taken the right decision. 🤍🤍Stay blessed gorgeous. You are divinely loved.
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Thank you so much! You’re amazing! You too, stay blessed beautiful and you’re loved🤍🤍
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Thank you 🙏🏼🙏🏼
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