Be Inspired..!!

How I Accidentally Started Making Better Decisions Than My Drunk Self

A quick note from me: I really appreciate you checking out my blog! Just so you know, some of the links in this post are affiliate links. This means that if you buy something through them, I might earn a little bit of money, at no extra cost to you. There’s absolutely no pressure to buy anything, but if you do, it genuinely helps support the time and love I put into writing these posts.

Okay wait, so like, I was texting this guy at midnight last Tuesday, not even a good guy, just like, a medium guy, the kind where you’re like “well maybe he’ll surprise me” and I literally texted him a paragraph. A full paragraph. About nothing. And then I hit send and immediately thought “girl what are you DOING” and I couldn’t unsend it because apparently my phone doesn’t have a working back button anymore, so I just sat there at 12:15 a.m. thinking about how I keep doing this.

But here’s the thing. The actual thing. It’s not that I’m an idiot who makes bad dating decisions. It’s that I’m an idiot who makes bad dating decisions *at midnight*, specifically. Like, if he had texted me at 9 a.m., would I have written a paragraph? No. I would have been like “cool, I’m busy” and moved on with my life.

I started realizing something was happening in the mornings that was setting me up for failure at night. Like, my entire day was already compromised before I even got out of bed. I was touching my phone at like 5:47 a.m. not for anything urgent, just doom-scrolling, already anxious, already behind, already willing to accept whatever bullshit walked into my DMs by evening.

So anyway, I got weird about it. Really weird. Like, obsessively weird. I wanted to know if I could actually change my decisions about men by changing my mornings, which sounds insane when I say it out loud, but honestly? It worked.

The blackout curtains were first.

Not sexy. Not trendy. Just like, Blackout Curtains 100%, $25, they look fine, whatever. I put them up because I read somewhere that your cortisol is supposed to stay low until like 7 a.m. or something, and I was waking up at 5:30 because the sun was just blasting through my windows like an unwanted visitor.

But here’s what actually happened: I woke up slowly. Like, my body didn’t panic-jolt awake anymore. No adrenaline spike. No immediate anxiety. I just… woke up. And that’s when I realized that I’d been starting every single day in fight-or-flight mode. Like, literally, my nervous system was already freaking out before I was even conscious. So by 8 p.m., when he didn’t text back, I was already depleted, already desperate, already willing to chase.

It’s crazy how much that one thing changed, like, honestly it’s kind of embarrassing how much it changed.

Then I got this stupid water bottle.

Okay not stupid. YETI Rambler or literally any insulated water bottle, whatever, they’re all the same thing now. The point is I filled it with water at night and just… drank it. Like, by 7 a.m. I’d drink the whole thing without even thinking about it.

And look, I know everyone’s always like “hydration is everything” and it sounds like wellness bullshit, but like, dehydration literally makes your anxiety worse. Like, your brain is 60% water and if you’re running on empty, your amygdala is just screaming at you 24/7. You feel like something’s wrong even when nothing’s wrong. So you go looking for something to be wrong, and congrats, you found him, he’s emotionally unavailable, but at least now the anxiety makes sense.

Anyway, the water bottle was like, the first thing that actually worked. Not in a magical way. Just in a “oh, I’m calmer because I’m not running a dehydration-induced panic attack” way.

The magnesium happened at like 3 a.m. during a pandemic doom spiral.

Not gonna lie, I just bought NOW magnesium glycinate (it’s like $18) because someone on the internet said it helps you sleep, and I needed to sleep, and I was literally willing to try anything. But I ended up taking it in the morning because, honestly, who has time for an evening routine, and like, I just mixed it in my coffee and it tasted fine. Better than I expected, actually.

The thing about magnesium is that it like, genuinely calms your nervous system. Not in a “oh I’m sedated” way. In a “oh, I don’t need to respond to his Snapchat immediately” way. You’re not in emergency mode. You’re just… existing. Making decisions from a place where you’re not terrified he’s going to leave.

Which is wild because like, he probably IS going to leave, but at least if I’m calm about it, I won’t have sent eight follow-up messages first.

And then came creatine, which I swear I’m not trying to be a gym bro about.

Okay but like, five grams of Optimum-Nutrition-Creatine-Muscle-Strength mixed into literally anything, coffee, water, oatmeal, whatever, it’s like $15 for a tub that lasts forever. And I know creatine is supposedly for people with muscles, but it’s literally just something that helps your brain produce ATP when it’s running on fumes. Which, hello, I’m always running on fumes.

But here’s what’s weird: when my brain has the actual energy to think, I don’t catastrophize as much. Like, I can read his message and not immediately spiral into “he hates me, he’s leaving, this is over.” I can just be like “cool, he sent a short text, he might be busy, I don’t need to fix this.”

The version of me that’s sleep-deprived and magnesium-depleted and dehydrated? That version is texting novels at midnight. The version of me that’s had water and magnesium and creatine by 8 a.m.? That version is like “you know what, I have a life too, I’ll respond when I feel like it.”

By 9 a.m., you’re either set up to win or you’re not.

And like, honestly, I don’t even know if this is sustainable or if I’m just in a weird phase where I’m actually taking care of myself, which I know sounds dramatic but I don’t think I was, before. I was just like, running on emergency cortisol and hoping that white-knuckling through anxiety meant I was strong.

But here’s what I actually think is happening: your morning literally determines whether you’re going to text him back. Not because of willpower or self-respect (though honestly, respect is for people with functioning nervous systems). But because your nervous system doesn’t care about your values until it feels safe. It doesn’t care that he’s emotionally unavailable or that you deserve better. It cares that you’re dehydrated and haven’t had magnesium and you woke up in a panic.

So like, I fixed my mornings. Blackout curtains, water, magnesium, creatine. Nothing fancy. Nothing expensive. Nothing that requires you to be a “morning person” (I still hate mornings, I’m not going to lie about that).

And now like… I don’t know. He still doesn’t text back as much. That hasn’t changed. The men haven’t changed. But I have, and it turns out that’s the only variable I actually had control over.

Okay but here’s my actual question for you: Do you do any of this stuff? Like, do you have a weird morning ritual that actually works, or am I just like, finally experiencing what it feels like to be hydrated and I’m acting like I invented wellness?

I’m genuinely asking because I feel like half the time I don’t know if I’m onto something real or if I’m just another person who discovered supplements and thinks she cracked the code.

I write about this stuff, nervous system regulation, attachment anxiety, why we pick the people we pick, over on my Substack, and honestly, the best part is when people comment and tell me they do something similar, or they tried it and it didn’t work, or they think I’m full of it. So come hang out there. Subscribe. Tell me I’m insane or that you also have a weird morning routine that changed everything.

We can figure this out together.

Subscribe on Medium and Substack

Disclosure: As an Amazon Associate, I may earn from qualifying purchases, but this does not affect my recommendations. I only suggest products I’ve personally vetted.