Making bad decisions is not as bad it may seem.
“Why am I doing this to myself?” You experience this immediately after self-sabotage. Why would someone ostensibly on deliberately shoot oneself in the foot? Although you are aware of your superiority, you continue to fail yourself. You ponder whether it’s really possible to break your self-destructive cycle or whether you’ll always make the same mistakes. The cycle can be ended. Here’s how to identify your bad habits and change them.
Simple, Counter-intuitive, and Deadly Accurate – Self-harm gives you a warped sense of fulfilment. It offers certain feelings that aid in coping with and navigating life. Even if you cognitively desire to repair your damaged self-image, you eventually grow to emotionally enjoy it. This is supported by your self-sabotage. I used to question why I kept making mistakes. I looked for this mystical solution to what seemed like crazy behaviour. Why are you acting in this way if you want to improve your life, I’d question myself. I was unable to comprehend the truth the entire time. I had no desire to enhance my life. I desired to be a loser. My bad actions have certain benefits for me. I was motivated, but in a twisted way. So do you. You follow the “pay off principle.” Ask yourself, “What’s the payoff?” if you find yourself making poor decisions.
What benefit do you gain by ruining your life? I was able to maintain the persona of the “kid with potential,” which allowed me to live below my potential. Living in Potentialville was wonderful. You see, even if I tried really hard, I may still end up failing. I would lose my talent and ability if I failed. I wouldn’t be the bright young man with the whole world in front of him anymore. What is your reward? The payback principle aids in understanding both your own and other people’s behaviour.
“The Devil You Know” describes you. You get to stay who you are if you undermine yourself. Ego and identity preservation are the main paths back to the life you don’t wish to live. You would have to confess that you wasted a lot of time in your life feeling emotions you didn’t have to in order to change. We don’t want to acknowledge that our time was squandered. Additionally, there’s something unpleasant about trying your hardest while failing. To spare yourself the agony of actual failure, you defeat yourself before you ever begin. You would rather maintain your current state for the remainder of your life than completely change who you are. You must destroy your previous mental models, belief systems, and ingrained societal training if you want to change for the better. You have to accept you were duped, that you need to start over in a modest position, and that you don’t actually know all that much. The only option, albeit it doesn’t feel good, is this.
Refresh Your software. The more you see yourself as software that reacts to incentives rather than as a rational individual, the easier it will be for you to make changes in your life. You need to alter your programming, alter your rewards, and offer yourself a reward that is superior than the strange love affair you have with self-loathing.
It serves that goal to discover your mission. Up until I discovered writing, nothing gave me a bigger satisfaction than self-harm. That spark of inspiration instantly captured me. You can experience the procedure differently. Before you ruin yourself as usual, you’ll need to identify the item and perform it for long enough to gain traction. There is one resource you may utilise that just might be potent enough to influence your behaviour.
The most effective source of change is this. This flip may result from genuine discomfort. You may become so discouraged by life that you decide to give up. The reward doesn’t make life in this way acceptable. But frequently, people only feel a level of discomfort that is below the cutoff. It’s a low-level, dull agony of anxiousness that irritates them occasionally but isn’t severe enough to outweigh the benefits of being able to understand their life.
It’s a horrible trap, similar to the parable of the frog that is sitting in a pot of boiling water but doesn’t jump out since the heat is increasing so gradually. Your best bet is to force yourself to come to the brutal realisation that, in many respects, you’re wasting your life. Realise that thinking you are wasting your life is not dramatic. Change your payout after that. It is far easier to feel the benefits of taking the untrodden path than it is to describe, but I’ll try. You experience power. Most individuals are unable to manipulate reality with their willpower, but you can. You believe that you know something that only a select few others know. You are really proud of yourself for not disappointing the idealistic younger version of yourself. There isn’t any better reward.
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One Comment Add yours
Making bad decisions and then being a worse person than most others have been, afforded me with an opportunity to help and explain to people who have been similar issues how I coped and dealt with mine. Affording the opportunity to give options to people. It’s like you’re in a running race and then you are in last place and looking at your opponent’s position and what is going on. You can see what they’re doing and then you move out to the front and lead the others, you can tell them how you did it. My analogy at least